Field Guide · 8 Minute Read
What is TA?
Transactional Analysis (TA) is a theory of personality and a way of doing therapy, developed by the psychiatrist Eric Berne in the 1950s and 60s. Berne wanted ideas that clients could understand and use themselves, so TA deliberately uses everyday words. You don’t need to learn any of this before therapy — but many people find it helps to have a map.
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01Ego States
TA describes three ego states — Parent, Adult and Child — consistent ways of thinking, feeling and behaving that we all move between. Tap a circle to explore each one.
Adult Ego State
Responding to what is happening here and now, with all the resources you have as a grown person.
Sounds like: “I notice I’m anxious. What’s going on, and what do I want to do?”
02Transactions
A transaction is one exchange: something said, and the response. Each comes from an ego state and is aimed at one in the other person. This is why some conversations flow and others blow up. Pick a type to see how it works.
Solid arrows: 1 → stimulus · 2 ← response
Adult → Adult“Do you know what time it is?”
Adult → Adult“Just after three.”
Complementary
The reply comes back from the ego state it was aimed at. As long as transactions stay complementary, the conversation can carry on.
03Strokes
We all need to be noticed. A stroke is any act of recognition — a smile, a compliment, a criticism, a nod. Berne saw recognition as a basic human hunger. When positive strokes are scarce, we often (without realising) go looking for negative ones, because being told off still beats being ignored.
Positive · Unconditional
“I love you.” For who you are.
Positive · Conditional
“That report was really clear.” For what you did.
Negative · Conditional
“You were late again.” About a behaviour.
Negative · Unconditional
“You’re hopeless.” About who you are.
04Life Positions
TA’s best-known phrase, “I’m OK, You’re OK”, describes a basic stance towards yourself and others. We all move between these four, especially under stress. Tap one.
I’m OK, You’re OK
A realistic, healthy stance. You can disagree, set boundaries and solve problems without anyone needing to be the bad one.
Inner voice: “We see this differently. Let’s work it out.”
05Drivers
Taibi Kahler identified five “drivers” — unspoken rules that promise we’ll be OK as long as we obey them. Which sounds familiar?
You Might Notice
Redoing work that was already fine. Struggling to finish things. Lots of “actually…” and careful qualifying.
A Permission to Try
You’re good enough as you are.
06Life Script
As children we make sense of the world with the information we have. Out of that, we form conclusions — “I have to look after everyone”, “I mustn’t need too much”, “people leave” — that can quietly shape a whole life.
Berne called this the life script. The hopeful part of TA is that what was decided can be redecided, now, with an adult’s understanding. That is a large part of what therapy is for: noticing the script, understanding why it made sense, and choosing what to keep.